The girls are one month old today. They have been in the NICU for 31 days now. And they are 36 weeks gestation today too. When we first started this NICU journey, most of the nurses told us the girls would probably be here until 37 weeks gestation (or one more week now), and that seemed like ages. Now we are here and it hasn't been THAT long, but it's definitely been a strain.
They are so very close to going home. So close that we can see it...but each day is a trial. The two remaining things to overcome are full feeds and bradys (heart rate dips due to forgetting to breathe). They have to go 5 full days without a brady. The girls are really making headway with feeds, so it looked like we were going to get them home this weekend. Then one had a Brady this morning - and she's taking more feeds than her sister, so would have been more likely to go home.
It's odd how devastating that is. I've dealt with much much worse, but it seems being so close and "losing it" just undoes me. I do want what's best for the girls, and I want them safe. I understand that is what is taking place by keeping them in the NICU longer, but I don't like it. I'm ready to have them both home. And I think I'll deal much better (though I'll be more sleep deprived) once they are home.
Wednesday, June 20, 2012
Wednesday, June 13, 2012
Twins birth story
Our twins girls were born on May 20th. I'm now writing this almost 4 weeks later - while I pump and they are in the NICU. You would think I'd have lots of time to write and catch up on things while the girls aren't home, but I don't. I spend any available time at the NICU. And what's left I spend with my husband and our other daughter. It's been exhausting and we don't even have babies home yet!
The girls were born on a Sunday. I was 31 weeks and 4 days pregnant. I didn't have any signs of impending birth really...other than my standard contractions, but I'd been having those since 14 weeks. I had come off work for "house rest" at 24 weeks. My day had been filled with daytime TV and lots of laundry (preparing for two more girls).
The night before, we had dinner with friends. I had not been feeling so great, so I spent some of the evening just lying in bed watching HGTV. In fact, I hadn't been feeling so great for about two weeks, but i had attributed that to carrying two babies around. And baby B was way up in my ribs most of the time, so I was uncomfortable. Plus most of the time I couldn't really sleep at night.
I woke up Sunday morning around 6:39 slightly wet down there. When I went to the bathroom I thought I used the bathroom, but it didn't feel quite like normal. Then again, most things weren't feeling normal at 31 weeks pregnant with twins. The thought that I could be leaking did cross my mind, but I also contemplated that I may have just peed on myself - a common occurrence in twin pregnancy so I had heard.
I decided to wait and see before calling the doctor. So, I got up with our daughter to watch cartoons and decided to sit on a towel just in case. Nothing happened...then I went to the bathroom again and saw the tiniest tinge of pink - combined with that not quite right feeling when I used the bathroom. At this point i told my husband he should probably get out of bed just in case! He promptly got in the shower while I called the doctor. When the doctor heard my story, he told me to go to L&D.
We made arrangements for our daughter and headed to the hospital. My bag was already packed, so there were only a few more things to add. We called our parents on the way - even though originally i had wanted to wait until we knew for sure. Once at L&D, we were talking to the nurses for admitting and they asked I had a gush of water or anything. I was in the midst of saying no when I had a small gush. I officially knew then what was happening. My water had broke. What I didn't know was if they would want to delay delivery at all due to only being 31w4d.
The nurse checked me and was pretty sure my water had broken as well. We waited for the final call from the doctor. Once he arrived and did an exam there was no question. The verdict was that I would have the babies right then - within two hours!!!
The rest proceeded like a normal c-section. The girls were born one minute apart. My doctor came in to deliver them (he wasn't on call that weekend). He lifted each baby over the curtain for me to see before handing them off to their own NICU team. Yes, they each had their own team prepared for their arrival since they were so early. Both girls let out a cry when they were born - though small. And my one big memory was thinking how small they were. After baby B was born, I commented to my husband about how small she was and then just broke down and cried. It was a very unexpected day. They were hear and safe, just still too early.
Both girls were taken to the NICU and eventually put on oxygen.
The girls were born on a Sunday. I was 31 weeks and 4 days pregnant. I didn't have any signs of impending birth really...other than my standard contractions, but I'd been having those since 14 weeks. I had come off work for "house rest" at 24 weeks. My day had been filled with daytime TV and lots of laundry (preparing for two more girls).
The night before, we had dinner with friends. I had not been feeling so great, so I spent some of the evening just lying in bed watching HGTV. In fact, I hadn't been feeling so great for about two weeks, but i had attributed that to carrying two babies around. And baby B was way up in my ribs most of the time, so I was uncomfortable. Plus most of the time I couldn't really sleep at night.
I woke up Sunday morning around 6:39 slightly wet down there. When I went to the bathroom I thought I used the bathroom, but it didn't feel quite like normal. Then again, most things weren't feeling normal at 31 weeks pregnant with twins. The thought that I could be leaking did cross my mind, but I also contemplated that I may have just peed on myself - a common occurrence in twin pregnancy so I had heard.
I decided to wait and see before calling the doctor. So, I got up with our daughter to watch cartoons and decided to sit on a towel just in case. Nothing happened...then I went to the bathroom again and saw the tiniest tinge of pink - combined with that not quite right feeling when I used the bathroom. At this point i told my husband he should probably get out of bed just in case! He promptly got in the shower while I called the doctor. When the doctor heard my story, he told me to go to L&D.
We made arrangements for our daughter and headed to the hospital. My bag was already packed, so there were only a few more things to add. We called our parents on the way - even though originally i had wanted to wait until we knew for sure. Once at L&D, we were talking to the nurses for admitting and they asked I had a gush of water or anything. I was in the midst of saying no when I had a small gush. I officially knew then what was happening. My water had broke. What I didn't know was if they would want to delay delivery at all due to only being 31w4d.
The nurse checked me and was pretty sure my water had broken as well. We waited for the final call from the doctor. Once he arrived and did an exam there was no question. The verdict was that I would have the babies right then - within two hours!!!
The rest proceeded like a normal c-section. The girls were born one minute apart. My doctor came in to deliver them (he wasn't on call that weekend). He lifted each baby over the curtain for me to see before handing them off to their own NICU team. Yes, they each had their own team prepared for their arrival since they were so early. Both girls let out a cry when they were born - though small. And my one big memory was thinking how small they were. After baby B was born, I commented to my husband about how small she was and then just broke down and cried. It was a very unexpected day. They were hear and safe, just still too early.
Both girls were taken to the NICU and eventually put on oxygen.
Tuesday, June 12, 2012
24 days in NICU
That's just 3.5 weeks. The girls have been in the NICU for 24 days now. DH and I have been to the NICU every day. It's honestly exhausting. I mean I know that eventually we will have our two new babies home, and THAT will be totally exhausting...but in a different way.
The girls are doing good. They are both in "open beds" - like a normal newborn. That means they can maintain their body temp on their own. They are breathing on their own - and have been for a while now. And they have started 5-6 oral feeds a day, which is huge. Tomorrow they will be 35 weeks gestationally. Our first daughter was born at 35w1d, so it's quite a difference to see our twins compared to her.
NICU is hard. It is, of course, much easier than what we have previously been through...but it has it's own share of ups and downs. We are very lucky that the girls have done so well and we've had great nurses to help us through everything. It's just hard not having your babies with you - especially when you feel very much like you should still be pregnant! And it's hard to trust other people (even well trained nurses) to care for your tiny babies.
Hopefully we are nearing the end of the NICU stay. The girls just need to get more stamina to stay awake during feeds, and keep remembering to breathe - no more bradys.
The girls are doing good. They are both in "open beds" - like a normal newborn. That means they can maintain their body temp on their own. They are breathing on their own - and have been for a while now. And they have started 5-6 oral feeds a day, which is huge. Tomorrow they will be 35 weeks gestationally. Our first daughter was born at 35w1d, so it's quite a difference to see our twins compared to her.
NICU is hard. It is, of course, much easier than what we have previously been through...but it has it's own share of ups and downs. We are very lucky that the girls have done so well and we've had great nurses to help us through everything. It's just hard not having your babies with you - especially when you feel very much like you should still be pregnant! And it's hard to trust other people (even well trained nurses) to care for your tiny babies.
Hopefully we are nearing the end of the NICU stay. The girls just need to get more stamina to stay awake during feeds, and keep remembering to breathe - no more bradys.
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