Some people remembered, mostly due to facebook and what I posted there. I feel both weird and pushy at the same time as oddly relieved when I share anything about the boys on there. I don't post looking for the sympathy, but I do want people to remember. I want that so that what we went through was not in vain.
Today we went to church, visited the cemetery, made cupcakes, and had dinner with friends. Singing in church was hard - it's hard (just on some days) to sing praise to the one that now has my babies. Mainly because I just don't understand. The cemetery is weird while toting a 19 month old. Making the cupcakes is my way of coping. They were rainbow with homemade icing.
I know Brayden is having a wonderful birthday with all the other angels. I still miss him. And it still hurts that the rest of the world doesn't stop and realize this day. Three years ago I lost myself to the unbelievable. Somehow - through the grace of God and the constant presence of angels - I'm still going. I have a beautiful family now that includes an earthly child. It's all amazing to look back on. But it's still sad, and I don't think that will ever change.
Today I celebrate our second born, Brayden. Happy Birthday to our football player with your big shoulders and stalky stature.
3 comments:
hugs and remembering...
here from LFCA to remember ... the rainbow cupcakes are beautiful. *hugs* to you today.
Happy belated birthday to your football playing Brayden. I've been MIA lately, but I remember him your sons even if I don't stop by and comment.
Thinking of you momma.
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