Not my week

Ok, I'm going to complain. I know that in the land of loss and fellow deadbabymamas everything I'm about to complain about is so incredibly trivial. But...this is my outlet. Maybe my worries this week will help you to laugh a bit. Don't worry, I don't mind if you laugh at me - I myself seem to vary between laughter and tears this week almost by the minute.

The brief synopsis is: I got AF on Saturday. Last nursing session was last night. A coworker (male) asked if I was pregnant yesterday - NO I am not. And Cooper's birthday is on Friday. Oh, and it seems that my poor DH can't do anything "right" to fix any of it.

So I'm PMSing and crampy and tired and emotional...then some stupid man asks me if I'm pregnant!!!! It was too much. He even preface the question with "I don't mean to be rude". Newsflash - if you have to preface a question with that, you probably shouldn't ask the question. Stupid man!!!!!!! Even if I did appear pregnant (which I only have the c-sec pooch now), you shouldn't ask such a question unless you are positive that the woman is pregnant. Ugghhh!

Cooper's birthday is seeming to sneak up on me this year. I was so engrossed in everything for Riley's party...now it feels like I'm forgetting Cooper. That feels horrible to me. The past two years, DH and I have taken the day off together. This year there is "no way" he can take the day off. He's busy, and I get that. But it hurts because it feels like another way we are forgetting our first born. It's sad to see life keep going and passing him by. I'm taking a half day - only half because I don't want to just sulk at home by myself.

And this whole period thing is for the birds!!! I guess I forgot this wonder of being a woman since I haven't had to deal with it for almost 2 years. I want to bite everyone's head off. And I don't think there is enough chocolate in the world anywhere!

Back to my life...I'm thankful for everything. I have a wonderful husband who stands by me through my crazies, two angel boys watching over me, an amazing little girl who is a true miracle, and a great support network of friends and family. I'm okay, but I did need to vent. If you made it this far, thanks for letting me complain. In the grand scheme, all of this is really nothing. Life keeps moving forward and I'm along for the ride.