After reading the comments from my last post, I wanted to give everyone a condensed version of all that has happened - I know all of you love to read every last word, but it can be time consuming :-)
16 weeks: "Regular" contractions start (3 hours worth of 3-5 minutes apart). Put on Procardia every 6 hours and home rest.
20 weeks: Contractions are breaking through...Procardia increased to ever 4 hours.
24 weeks: Contractions ranging 6-10 per hour consistently - even with meds.
28 weeks: U/S shows little girl practicing breathing.
30 weeks: Contractions break through Procardia. Changed to terbutaline pump with home contraction monitoring.
31 weeks: Terb "big dose" at 0.25ml every 4 hours. NOTE that when normal preggos go to L&D, the one shot they get is only 0.25ml.
31.5 weeks: One night of contractions (5-6 min apart for 5+ hours) = freak out and STEROID SHOTS!!!
32 weeks: Terb "big dose" increased to 0.26ml every 3 hours. Yes, I'm a bit shaky. Little girl is still practicing breathing in u/s.
33 weeks: Contractions ranging 6-10 per hour - even on the terb pump and with the increase dose.
To answer some of the comments: Yes, we got the steroids. She's shown practicing breathing in several ultrasounds, so we are not horribly concerned about her lungs. No amnio will be done since we did get the steroids and the results of the amnio wouldn't change my doc's mind about moving forward.
I know that suck/swallow/breathe will be the major thing for her to learn. I know that NICU is not a walk in the park. I also KNOW that my baby will get to come home - just not sure how soon after the delivery.
So, what I need from all of you is your support. The bottom line is that the decision of when our little girl gets here is ours alone...and that's a whole lot of weight on our shoulders. If we choose to deliver her too soon, we won't forgive ourselves for having her stay in the NICU and any complications. If we choose to deliver her later, something could happen - to me or to her...and we won't forgive ourselves for that either.
I appreciate the comments and the support, I promise. I'm just a bit hormonal about all this though. I'm totally terrified of making the wrong decision, and I've researched all I can on the internet. I trust my doc and don't believe that he wouldn't let me choose a date that would put my baby in harms way.
9 comments:
wow, i'm so sorry for the comments...you have to do whats best for YOU and clearly your doctors have done a great job of keeping you pregnant so i'm sure they will do the best for you and your baby girl.
as someone whose had a baby in the NICU for 69 days (yes, thats 10 weeks) it was "easy" in comparison to holding my two babies while they died in the same NICU my daugther once was in. no, it's not an easy road but easier than the alternative.
and yay for steroid shots! those things are amazing!!
best of luck to you!
I'm sorry I didn't read the last comments, but I'm sorry if I opened up a can of worms. Perhaps I should have just email you privately.
I do support you. I'm so incredibly happy that you've gotten so far. You've had an incredible journey to get here and it hasn't been one without stress, anxiety, or it's own problems. I thought that you had the steroid shots, but I wanted to be sure.
I have a problem now, that started when Dylan was born dead, that I always have to tell people my experiences. I'm not always as tactful as I should be, but I always do it with the best intentions. It would kill me if someone else that I cared about went through the same hell that I have and I just sat by without saying anything. That, to me, would be the worst that could happen. I know that you have your baby girl's best interest at heart. I know that she is coming home, too. I also know that you know what's best for her, and I hope that I didn't come across that way.
I should have kept my mouth shut. I'm sorry. I know that you have a lot of stress and I didn't mean to add anymore. I just needed to tell you...
Take care, and I can't wait to read your birth story regardless of when it comes!
Sorry if I caused any upset or worry - I am VERY excited for you and I know you're all doing what's best for your little one.
Hugs, hugs, hugs.......
My nephew was born at 36 weeks 2 days - no problems at all with his breathing/lungs/eating. He went home with mom and dad 3 days later! Praying for you and your sweet little girl. Good luck with your decision!
As one of your people, I never doubted that you had nothing but the best intentions for your little one. What mother doesn't want to bring home a healthy baby from the hospital? Of course, we know more than anyone what it is like to NOT bring your baby home. I have very good intuition, and I know for sure that your baby girl is going to be healthy and big and beautiful!
Oh, and I'm so impressed by your doctors' ability to keep your baby in this long with all of those contractions. I hope my doctor would be willing to do all of that for my next baby! You are in good hands, girl!
Of course you have our support! You have to do what is right for you, your baby and your body. Your doctor knows best what is going on with you. I don't think you made it seem like a stay in the NICU is a walk in the part. Of course you don't think that. But I agree with you, I'd rather have a child in the NICU and get to come home EVENTUALLY than bury my baby. I made comments about the steroids and amnio, because frankly I had forgotten all you had been through. Don't let peoples' comments (including mine) make you feel like you are doing something wrong. It is so tough having to make a decision like this knowing that there are dangers on both sides and not wanting to risk anything. Hugs from me and you will always have my support!
I didn't read the comments on your last post until now...girlfriend, I have a whole new respect for you because you were much nicer than I would have been.
Obviously you are intelligent enough--you did go to OSU, after all--to know the NICU isn't a picnic. You're making the right decision because what is 'right' is what you, your DH, and your doctors decide to do.
I can't wait to hear all about her!
I didn't think what I had to say was hurtful or offensive, but if it was, I am completely and totally sorry.
My opinion was just to have her enter this world later than earlier but still within the time frame your doctor suggested. I know you know what is best for you and your daughter- I never doubted that. You have my utmost respect and support. You always have.
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