We are starting my "scary weeks" now. My water broke at 21w2d with Cooper, and with Brayden I went on bedrest at 19w6d and lost him at 21w5d. Today I'm 20w4d. So, that's just 9 days until I'm the most pregnant I've ever been. Yes, I do believe that I'll make this milestone. That's about the extent of my positive thinking, but I think it's pretty impressive right now.
I remember hitting 20w with Cooper (our first). It was weird, but I suddenly breathed a bit easier. I had no idea about second trimester loss, but just making it to 13w didn't seem "safe" to me. So, I had held out until 20w. I was so very excited because I was half-way there. The second half of the pregnancy didn't seem like an overwhelming time. The baby would be here in just 20 short weeks. And then my water broke. Okay, so 20w is not a safe time either.
With Brayden, I remember hitting 21w2d (the gestation that we lost Cooper). It made me feel a bit better to get through that day, but I was not "in the dark" that time. I knew that there was no longer a safe zone for me. I was on bedrest for goodness sake. I was fighting to keep my baby inside of me. I didn't hit a time period that I felt safe with Brayden...I only went 3 more days more than with Cooper.
I have begun to wonder if I will ever feel safe (or safer) in this pregnancy. I know that I will be on pins and needles until the 24w mark at the very least. But then, IC can still affect women up to 28w...I think. So, maybe at the 28w mark? Even then, with the contractions and such I'm not sure I will have any more non scary weeks. So, I suppose I need to get use to this scary week anxiety as my new norm for the next 17weeks or so.
4 comments:
I agree that you will probably not have any more weeks that aren't scary. I do believe that you will have several more very scary weeks, but it will all be worth it when you are holding a breathing baby in your arms. I will be thinking of you over these next days. I can imagine how tough that must be. Hugs to you.
THinking of you through this excruciating time. It must be so hard.
Hour at a time, hour at a time.
Get thyself a lot of very good DVD's.
B
I have no idea the stress and worry you're going through, but I wanted to let you know that I'm thinking about you and your little one.
xoxo
The scary weeks start even earlier for me, so I know what you mean. And it seems like the time just drags on, doesn't it? I'm hoping and praying that the time passes quickly and uneventfully for you.
Post a Comment